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Passive Aggressive Behavior
There are many ways that people express their anger and their disappointment with someone. Most of us like it when someone that has a problem with us would come to us and let us know that they are upset and that there are some things that need to be discussed and worked out. Not everyone can be that direct, or they have no reason to work things out. Some are just hateful and there is nothing that they can do about it. These are the ones that tend to have passive aggressive behavior. It is one of the most annoying traits that someone can have.
There are many ways to show passive aggressive behavior. For the most part, someone will not be up front and honest. This might be the person that says everything is fine and that things have been solved, after a problem. However, they turn around and tell everyone else what a jerk you are and then go on and on about you. They are being passive to your face, and displaying their aggression to everyone else. Most don’t know that this is passive aggressive behavior, but it is some of the worst out there.
Some people who have passive aggressive behavior will say things that have double meanings. You probably know a few people like this. There is something to sarcasm that can be fun, and is how some relate to each other. However, those people know that it is all done with love. Some use sarcasm as a way of passive aggressive behavior. You can be left scratching your head when they say something to you, as you are wondering if their words have a double meaning or if they are just trying to be funny.
Handling someone with passive aggressive behavior can be hard if you let it go on. What you have to do is to tell them flat out that if they have a problem or something to say to you that they have to speak up because you can not read their mind. Tell them that talking to everyone else about you, but then being nice to your face does not solve anything, and also makes them look like a big, fat phony, which is something no one likes. They can be honest and upfront or they can get out of your life.
If you are the one that seems to have problems with passive aggressive behavior, you have to ask yourself why that is the way you choose to communicate if there is a problem. There are probably reasons why you are dealing with things in this manner. One of the biggest is that you get frustrated, but you hate confrontation and are afraid of what would happen if you told someone that something is wrong. Learn to be more direct and learn to talk to someone if you have to do it. You may feel uncomfortable at first, but you will feel better when things are out in the open.
Summary
Passive aggressive behaviors tend to show up in people as lies or double edged conversations where people say one thing and mean another. People who have this tendancy may be called two-faced by others. Being afraid of dealing with issues is the number one cause of this problem in people.
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